Inspiring songs...

Sometimes, inspiration comes from God in ways I always least expected. Though it should not catch me by surprise cause I should be expecting it,yet it still amazes me how much He has NEVER given up hope on me..

My dear housemates Priscilla and Christy bought me a Casting Crowns for my birthday. Never heard of the band before but Prics says that it is a must listen.

And I agree...

Listening to the songs felt like He was telling me something. It felt likt God was talking to me,finally.After all these years of asking and begging to hear Him, He talks to me though a band i have never heard of and I believe,by His timely planning, Priscilla and Christy to introduce to me..

Thanks girls!!I love you crazily too!!!

Of the whole songs in that album,I found my inspiration to push though this tough phase of life in this one song that brought tears that is not tears that can be seen,but the tears that cannot be seen...

May this song bring some divine inspiration to you whose reading this..and if more, the unseen tears :)

Who am I?
That the Lord of all the earth,
Would care to know my name,
Would care to feel my hurt.
Who am I?
That the bright and morning star,
Would choose to light the way,
For my ever wandering heart.

Not because of who I am,
But because of what you've done.
Not because of what I've done,
But because of who you are.

I am a flower quickly fading,
Here today and gone tomorrow,
A wave tossed in the ocean,
A vapor in the wind.
Still you hear me when I'm calling,
Lord, you catch me when I'm falling,
And you've told me who I am.
I am yours.
I am yours.

Who am I?
That the eyes that see my sin
Would look on me with love
And watch me rise again.
Who am I?
That the voice that calmed the sea,
Would call out through the rain,
And calm the storm in me.

Not because of who I am,
But because of what you've done.
Not because of what I've done,
But because of who you are.

I am a flower quickly fading,
Here today and gone tomorrow,
A wave tossed in the ocean,
A vapor in the wind.
Still you hear me when I'm calling,
Lord, you catch me when I'm falling,
And you've told me who I am.
I am yours.

Not because of who I am,
But because of what you've done.
Not because of what I've done,
But because of who you are.

I am a flower quickly fading,
Here today and gone tomorrow,
A wave tossed in the ocean,
A vapor in the wind.
Still you hear me when I'm calling,
Lord, you catch me when I'm falling,
And you've told me who I am.
I am yours.
I am yours.
I am yours.

Whom shall I fear
Whom shall I fear
I am yours..
I am yours..

Here's how the song goes...

Loves...

Pics from ze annual income collection festival :)

 Ze grand family pic :)

Missing the puchi brother of mine who's all the way in UK..

sniff sniff...

 

It  is always a tradition to take a  pic of the offsprings-offsprings..

Again,lacking the tower of the family..sigh..

The spousies of the 1st gen offsprings..

Unfortunately there is no available photos of the 2nd gen offsprings spousies..

CAUSE THERE ISN'T ANY YET!!

*evil laugh*

  

The proud parent with their offsprings..

All sporting prosperous bellies..Hehe..

And my proudest work ever which is currently the desktop backdrop of my grandp's computer..

*beams*

And more pics to come if only my comp will stop dying on me..

Accidentally deleted a driver when my sis bf and I deleted the virus vault. Now my comp is going crazy thus I am undergoing as it is currently, the excruciating pain and torture of having to download the entire driver section cause dear clever me left all my disc in Seremban which is currently collecting dusts and dropped paints from the painter who is painting the house..Sigh.

How my great mind works at times still never cease to amaze me...

And my lack of good relationship with the IT world which just seems to elude me all the time cause I think it secretly despises me..Not my fault,I tried..

I tend to rantle too much I know..

Thats why you have to have a STRONG ear to be around me...

Yet another collage...and certain train of thoughts.

Yes, in the midst of my boredom and fascination for Photoscape, I have produced ANOTHER collage of me family :)

Still in need to hunt down more pictures. Need a camera and another harddrive now.My current 300Gig harddrive is FULL!!!

Too many songs inside and movies that I cant bring myself to delete (I think I'm the virtual junkie keeper person..hehe)

Reports,reports and MORE REPORTS again..

Sign,it seems like all clinical school is about it reports, clerking and trying to catch interesting patients to learn as much as you can.

Involves a lot of time management, which is not really my area cause I tend to do things when and where I feel like it.

Sniff,sniff...

~.~.~.~.~.~.~

I realized that sometimes in life, I tend to really take things for granted.

I grumble about the little petite things in my life.

Why my lecturers are always picking on me (I still do not believe I have this HUGE NEON sign on my head that says 'Victimize me' )

Why I have so much of reports to finish all the time..

Why I just don't have the time to do the things I want..

Why Why and more Why Me's..

It sounds so selfish of me.It felt like all I cared about was I, ME ,MYSELF.

All I could see was poor lil ME and all the misfortunes that comes with being born as ME.

Until I walked into the Hugh Density Unit last week to see a patient.

No,lets not call her a patient. Let me call her a friend.

Her name is Elizabeth. She was born with scoliosis.(Click on it if you do not know what that is). She never asked to be born with it.The consequence of having this condition is endless and life is like a thin piece of thread for her that could break any moment.

Or like a candle exposed to the harsh winds but is blocked by a sheet of paper.

So fragile.

Yet, despite all her hardship,she endured.

She did not grumble about her condition, she accepted it from a young age that she was different.Occasionally she would cry about it but she still kept her spirits high.

And high did her spirits go that she endured all the way till university.

Until she came back for the holidays and was infected with a lung infection. A reminder again that with her condition, any form of infection of injury is HIGHLY dangerous. She had to be admitted to HDU and was intubated from her trachea at first but because of her abnormal size and curvature of her airways, the staff could not find a suitable tube to intubate her with. So she was intubated orally.

Now, intubation is not a fun thing to endure.You cant talk, cant eat, cant drink and cant even swallow your own saliva.Its a horrible experience, one I hope I'l never endure.

She fought to keep her spirits up. Whatever hope she had she clung on to it for dear life.

But there is so much your spirit can cling to.

She slowly slipped into depression, she hated the tube,hated being stuck on bed all day with multiple weird machines beeping around her.

She got lonely at night when there was no one around.

Her condition slowly deteriorated.

I could see her fighting to live,she really wanted out. But the reality was hitting hard against her door that it was slowly sticking its foot in and eventually its wholeself.

Everyday when I went to see her,I could feel my heart crying out for her, for a miracle,any miracle.

Anyone who saw her would feel the same.

She would try to cheerfully greet me when she saw me.But I could still see the pain in her eyes. She would always want to hold my hand as I stand by her bed and talk to her. And she would always point to her tube and ask for it to be removed but because I have no authority, I can only shake my head and say sorry. And her tears will flow.

Last Friday, I found her alone.She was finally off the tube but on the mask which she found uncomfortable as the air blowing through the mask was noisy. Her eyes lighted up when she saw me. She was too weak to beckon me over but she had the strength to hold my hand again. She told me she was only having the mask on until 11am. Then she wouldn't know what happens after.

As I stood there holding her hand, I could not help but marvel and her fragile yet enduring strength. I said a silent prayer for her. That she will see through this. The doctor came to see her and told her she needed the mask for a day. She begged the doctor to have it removed but the doctor did not want to give up on her.

When the doctors left,I too wanted to leave. But she clung on to my hand and looked at me with pleading eyes.

I could see her mouthing the words 'Stay with me'.

And I nearly broke down.

I stayed with her until her parents came and quietly took my leave after saying Hi to her parents.

What a way to be given a reality check.

Her condition has been improving really slowly but surely.She almost gave up hope a few times,had to be resuscitated. But she pulled through.

And I know she will pull through right till the end.

She has a fighter spirit in her although at times, she does have her doubts.

Please keep her in prayers.

How small my groans and whines seem when compared to her.

How small I feel, when I have everything I could asked for when compared to her.

I have to learn to be more grateful for everything I am and everything I have.

For now,I will continue to visit her everyday I'm there until she is discharged to remind myself life's not about me..

Its not about my petite complains.

Its SO MUCH MORE than that...

Its been awhile

Yea yea...

I know its been A LONG while since I've written anything.

Writers block..

Then had a huge infulx of inspiration on what to blog bout..But lazy to type cause it was ALOT!

So instead of blogging,let me show you something I did while I was bored and feeling uninspired to study..

Took me half an hour to play with it but hey,I LOVE IT!!

Part 1 of the People in my life :)

Most of the people I love..

and their faces immortalized here..

I love you people!!

And there is definitely more to come but I realized I'm lacking alot of things..

The most important being PICTURES!!!

Hence,I'm in need to hunt down all the pics from those who owe me and those who don't but I still want to steal..hehe..

And that is only 1 part of it...

 Think I am in great need of a camera now.

Need to capture the moments of my life while it slowly slips away.

Want to remember the moments with everyone..

Who knows I might have Alzheimer's one day and the only way to preserve the memory is by capturing it in pictures :)

Then there is also the time to put it up nicely..

Haha,the laziness is kicking in again..

Inspiration from 'above'

I've been having this piece of paper stuck on my board in my home since I can remember when.

I usually tend to ignore it until I find myself stuck to my chair as exams draw near and for a break,I just happen to look up and see that piece of paper that inspires me to push on..
And remind me that in everything I do..
I'm not alone..

I know most of us are facing hard times during the upcoming exams,as it is our first exam in clinical school so we are not so familiar to the system.To others, they are facing their biggest exams yet.

So,I'm hoping that after u read this,u'l feel just as inspired as I am to push on.
And remember that in everything we do,We're Not Alone.

His Watching Over Us :)

I am to blessed to be stressed!!!!

The shortest distance between a problem and a solution,

Is the distance between your knees and the floor.

Those who kneel to the Lord can stand up to ANYTHING

So yea,during exam period time you'l prob see me limping around complaining of knee pains.
Its that symdrome priest get coz they kneel down to much..
Dang,can't remember the word for it..

So to me friends who are facing exams and stressing out..
All the best!!
And to my bodoh-clan,lets just keep remaining bodoh..
Lol,just kidding!!

Of scales and more nonsensical reports

Reports...

Reports...

Reports...

And More Reports..

Why did God create REPORTS!!!

Why do we have to type SO MANY REPORTS!!

Wasting paper and killing more trees only...

I wonder if the hantu that came up with this idea of writing THIS MANY reports is related to the owner of the A4 paper company or something...

Next monday holiday...

YESH!! CANT WAIT!!!

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Eversince I started Int Med posting, I meet patients who are constantly in pain and I find myself having to ask them this favourite question everytime.

Me : So,on the scale of 1 to 10, with 1 being pain that u can bear and 10 being unbearable pain that death seems so much sweeter (Ok,maybe i didn't say it that way but it still has death being so much better than the pain), how would u rate your pain?

On one occasion, a friend of mine asked that question to a patient who said he was in so much pain that is was so unbearable and this was what happened..

Sky's Friend : So uncle, on the scale of 1 to 10,what you rate your pain? 1 is boleh tahan pain and 10 is pain until want to die (direct translations k)

Patient : 1

And since we are on the subject of scales..
I was feeeling really depressed the other day cause I just finished my mini -CEX (its not pronounced SEX although it seems like that) and the feedback I got was I need to study more.It was not just from the lecturer (Thanks Dr Koh,you were really nice. You ROCK!! => OK,if your reading this,you did not see that statement yeah Dr. I'l bring a yellow bag for you incase I see u and if u ask me question and my answer makes u want to 'vomit blood'. Since the dustbin I pointed to is not the right place to vomit in..Hehe.. ) but it also came from following doctors for rounds and when they bombard me with questions, half the time I stand there stumped and admittingly telling them the much dreaded words most people don't like to hear.

"I'm sorry but I don't know."

Although its an honest answer,I cant help feeling so stoopid and how low it makes me feel to tell them I don't know.Sometimes I wonder if i'm studying right.I read alot but when questions are thrown at me,my brain feels like its been dipped in Nitrogen solution or suddenly the flow of electrical impulses all stop to the simultaneous Red light.And truth to be told,its affecting my morale and confidence in this field even more.

I want to do what I'm doing now.I want to do medicine cause everyday is really exciting.The patients I meet and talk to, the new things I see that most people would never believe is possible.

But,am I good enough?

Am I really prepared?

My sister told me one of her friend who was suppose to be doing housemanship has quit.Mum,jie and I were talking about it over the dinner table.We felt it was strange and such a waste.But what I took away from that table troubled me more and further pulmate my confidence.

What if I end up like Jie's friend?

What if I cant take the stress?

What if I make it all the way cause thats as much strength I have but the next 2 years in housemanship is the final straw for me?

I don't want to end up like Jie's friend.
I want to succeed.

And mum said something else that really struck a cord and now has me chewing on.

Studying is one thing in medicine,the stress is another thing.Everyone can study but not everyone can take the pressure.

And after all that pondering,I came up with this scale that's currently posted on my MSN pm.
Its call the stoopid scale.
Goes more or less along the same line as the pain scale : 1 being bearble stoopid,10 being REALLY TOTALLY INSANELY BEYOND DOUBT (and help) stupid..
Basically its asking people to rate how stoopid they think I am..

So...

On the scale of 1 to 10,How stoopid do u think I am? 

 Honestly speaking..

I hate being the evil,mean person that'l make me really hate-able.

I prefer to stay out and just stay down,make peace...

(Think this influence came from watching all those movies like Black Hawk Down and Band of Brothers)

Why cause a commotion when there is always a more reasonable,rationale and less voice-raising way to settle things?

But of course,easier said than done..

Desperate times occasionally calls for desperate measures..

And sometimes,hoping to be nice is not an option.

Its a forceful way if I want to survive and not get trampled on.

Yes,just because I'm small sized and smile or laugh alot and play more than I should DOESN'T mean I'm what I look like on the outside.

It doesn't mean I can be easily taken advantage of.

Neither does it mean,I'l always give in with a smile.

I'm not an idiot,nor am I as docile as u see me..

I merely choose to not be that vicious mean beast that everyone has and openly show it.

But trample on me,or take advantage of me..

I'l make hell seem like heaven for you..

I still prefer to be nice and peaceful.

So please,don't provoke me....

One of the best love poems to read

Got this wonderful love poem sent to my phone this morning that just really made my day :)

This poem was created through a series of sms-es

EK : OMG the sky is so dark..

ME : But its shining bright here..

Ek : Now its raining

Haha.

GOTCHA!!

Super randomness of the day.
If you didn't get the joke,its ok.Its an internal joke,your not slow.

And an extra note to add,I'm NOT ATTACHED!!And NO PRIS and CHRISTY!! I DO NOT WAN FLETCHER (or however you spell that idiot's name)
I'd rather take the scapel and slit my wrist than let him come near me or have anything to do with him...
Nono,i'm not advertising myself.
I'm pointing out that this was never actually a love poem.
ALthough it can sound like one..

And another internal joke to add for the day...

I Wonder Why??

*cheesy grinz*

Sky....

Just heard her neighbour screamed and is wondering whats wrong..

And now is recalling CW-Ian-JM-Lippy's neighbour incident...

And is wondering now if should go check or do the Lippy thing..

And now is starting to panic cause she hasn't studied the entire weekend..

Needs to stop typing from a 3rd person's POV...

Misses her home and TV + Astro on a nice warm,lazy weekend afternoon like this...

Discovery of the day

Who would have thought that you don't always have to have pure SALT in your kitchen to cook something good ?

Yup,I is not kidding.

Was too tired today to join my fellow housemates and extended housemate for dinner.Told them not to buy dinner for me in case I woke up really late and have no appetite to eat since I kinda screwed up my gastric rhythm.Unfortunately,since I'm a slight sleeper,once waken no more sleep for me.So after another 10 minutes of snoozing and unable to continue on,I decided to dig in the fridge for dinner and found :

1) One ready made ceaser salad purchased from Jusco (gotta love them,make life so much easier)
2) Mushrooms
3) Frozen solid chicken breast meat (took me half an hour to defrost it and ripping it apart)
4) NO SALT !!! (lolz )

So decided to whip up a ceaser salad minus the salt for the chicken grilling.Instead,after much digging in the kitchen,I found....

GROUNDED CHICKEN CUBES!! (i think this was from Liyen,or is it Jo's? But thanks anyway,quite a lifesaver)
Marinated the chicken breast with it plus some pepper and TADAA!!!!

Ceaser Salad with NO SALT!! :)
And mind u,the grilled chicken with chicken cube seasoning was AWESOME!!
Hehe....
Bet you did'nt know that rite?

Gonna experiment somemore in the kitchen when I'm more free..Lalala..
Sorry no pictures.Was too hungry to snap any.Evidence of it is well,something you wouldn't want to know or see *grinz*

I should start watching what I eat...I'm starting my slow crawl to THAT age  *gasps*

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Was looking at Yeen's photos on FB of her Pub Crawl in Leichester when I crossed a picture of guys donning banana suits.
And now,I have this annoyingly hyper song stuck in my head...GRR!!!



Seriously ANNOYING me now!!

It seems this famous saying's been passing round alot these days.
Is there a season for all this old proverbs thingy?

If life gives you lemons,make lemonade.

I say..
If life gives you lemon,take it,cut it in half and rub it back at the idiot's face who gave it to you :)

I'm feeling biatchy coz I'm having a very congested nose and running a fever...

Troubles and woes..

So I is back in Seremban again..

Sad and depressing to come back...

Having attachments issues....

And I thought moving to Seremban was gonna be fun and exciting.

Not that it isn't but,I guess I'm still kinda attached to HOME.My KL Home,with my room and bed,and familiar halls,familiar streets.Despite the fact that its kinda empty at the moment.But still,its HOME...

And better part yet,I didn't come home alone.

Yup,I came back with a good old friend called Viral infection!NO its not H1N1,its just a throat infection. Think I contracted it when I was in KL.Now my throat hurts,and I mean REALLY hurts to the point I cant swallow even water properly or breathe coz it feels like someone poured kerosine down my throat and lighted it.Pharyngeal walls are nicely inflammed and itchy too.

Better part,from the sorethroat I'm now having a terrible blocked nose which makes it EVEN MORE impossible to breathe.

Me and my wonderfully dysfunctional body.

To add the cream on this wonderful cake,I have a mini evaluation on Monday with my mentor on how I clerk pateints.Brownie points to anyone who can tell me how I'm gonna communicate with them when I cant even open my mouth without screwing up my face in pain,and thats JUST opening my mouth.Don't ask how I look when I want to eat,drink or breathe deeply to compensate my blocked nose.

Sometimes,I feel like it really sucks having to be the 'evil' person.The mean person who has nothing nice coming out from his/her tougue.No one likes being that kind of person.But i feel like sometimes,its not a matter of choice but more of duty or the situation calls for it.And u know that by being mean,certain barriers will be broken and perceptions will change,and probably,consequences too.

I really don't want to be a mean person,really.I hate being mean.

But I think I have to now cause people are starting to step over my head and think I'm an idiot just cause I don't say anything when they do but silently hope that they'l not do it again. This is in HUGE regards to my landlord and his electrician who has done nothing but gave empty promises of coming to fix the house and the heater.Yes,we're still stuck with icy cold showers.The Raya week would have been perfect to get things done but I guess,even chinese and indians want to berRaya too.

How am I gonna talk to them if my throat is like this?

IN NEED OF MIRACLE!!!

Because I was bored and notty..

Been trying to revamp this damn blog but lets face it,I know nuts bout revamping blogs and editting in nice stuffs to make it look better coz :

1) I don't have the time

2) I end up wanting to make things simple and uncomplicated

3) I just get lost with all those HTML language

Cute lil Chloe agreed to stay the night with me (NO,its not what you think!!)
So since she's quite a late sleeper,I'm now left to wait for her to wake up while she cutely sleeps on the spare bed in my room.Yes,she's THAT adorable even when she sleeps.So like a little life size doll you could squeeze the life out of..
Not that I want to squeeze the life out of u dear :)

Reminds me of the days when we slept over at YOUR house (Yes,you..u notty person who ran away from me to the otherside of the world and left me a 1 line piece of advice) and wake up late then head over to ur FAVOURITE cafe for branch.Hrm,since I'm kinda free today,maybe we shd make that trip over just so that it feels like ur still with us here laughing and gossiping away till the cows come home :P
I miss you girl!!!

I'm suppose to be typing my case summaries (yes,thy dreaded case summaries) after a GOOD LONG SLEEP!! *guilty*
But,guess what I'm typing now :) Don't need a no brainer to tell you that unless your one :P


Anyway,was playing with lil spoilt Rover when I saw my feet..

Seriously,it kinda freaked me out co it was the kind of feet we actually saw in medical books..
Kinda gross but pretty cool too..
Could poke and palpate them..

If ur getting grossed out,don't look...
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I'm warning you...
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Seriously...
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OK,don't say I didn't warn you...
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Feast your eyes on....

 MY PROTRUDING VEINS!!!!

*evil laugh*
Yes,the result of long standing hours in the hospital has lead to this unsightly beauty :P
Cool rite?!

I can palpate my dorsalis pedis pulse with no effort at all..

And its freaking STRONG!!

Thank goodness it hasn't developed to this.....

Although I think it might one day..

Yipes!!

I hate....

I'm gonna rant here alil so if ur not ready to hear me rant,bugger off!!

I'm not in a nice mood at the moment...

So sorry..

Right back to what I hate...

I HATE.......

1) Writing case summaries.WHY OH WHY DO WE NEED TO WRITE THOSE JUST BEATS THE CRAP OUT OF ME!!

2)Writing case presentation. What's the diff? One's longer than the other,one requires me to be more detail and precise and it takes up more of my time cause I'm stuck trying to figure out what to HECK to type for that damn report!

3)EVIL landlords who talk bullocks and think I'm THAT stoopid.Note to landlord,I WAS NOT BORN YESTERDAY!!

4)How my mouth runs away alot when my emotions runs TOO high. Need to clamp it shut more often. Need that damn Ipod!!

5) Having to come back from a good and relaxing holiday. Sucks coming back to reality eh?

6)Having to put down a good book just when I'm starting to get my mood back to reading. Finished Elizabeth Noble's - Things I want my daughters to know. Really good book and was really touched by it (not till I teared though). Just bought my new book, Diary of Anna Frank. To those who don't read much and are probably scratching your head wondering 'Who the heck's that?',she's the famous Jewish Teen who left a diary of her accounts when she and her family was in hiding from the Nazi's. Her diary touched the lives of millions and taught those who read it to appreciate the meaning of the word PEACE.
READ IT PPL!! ITS A DAMN GOOD BOOK!!!

7)Trying to make my list reach the perfect 10 but fail cause my list stops right here...

Sadly,as much as I hate it,I still have to face the evil,harsh cruel reality...

Hence, its back to them damn reports...

SIGH!!!

back from the dead

I'm back from the dead.Seriously...
I've no line at my place so communication with the outside world was limited to those living in the same cemetery with me or within the neighbouring tombstones.Why i say that is because everyone somewhat looks like a zombie by the time 2nd week was over..Don't have to ask why,doesn take a genius to figure that part out.

So first question u'l probably be asking what has happened from the land of the dead?
Well,I'm pretty much surviving.Hence,the rebirth from the dead.Or the awakening or the reliving or...whatever you want to put it la.
Am back in KL for the weekend.This is afterall my last weekend end with the brother.Trying to spend quality time with him (but he has run off to see his friends.sheesh,so much for being a loving brother).But its alright.I'm gonna miss him alot afterthis.

Sigh,wondering if it was the right thing to send him off to the airport.
No more bullying,no more annoying me when his bored.Just no more lil annoying-yet-oversized-kid-brother anymore.Feels really sad when I think of how I'm growing apart from my siblings.Think i just joined the bandwagon with my parents on the Empty Nest Syndrome.Life is such a biatch when it comes to goodbyes.
Still pinning for that space continuem time trap..
Yes,thats the sexay brother and sister of mine with the un-sexay me :)

Next question would probably be how's life there?
Life there is fine.Housemates are so-so.Of course,its quite true what they say :You never know the true nature of a person until you live with them.
Hands down to that.
The funny characters that sufaces when u really sit down to observe them in the house really amazes me.How i could miss such things before this stumps me.I guess,maybe its also cause i'm so use to living in my own home where everything is how i'm so use to it being.Thank God so far,no problems arise yet.
Sans with the landlord of course.
The masked landlord!!
Enough said.
The house?
HELL!!!
Ok,i lied alil.The house is ok as well.Not the kind of dream house anyone would be proud to annouce they live in.Here's the break down of THE HOUSE.

1) Strategic location smacked in the middle of almost everything.Walking distance to uni (sans when u forget something after u reached uni and have to walk back to get it..such a killer but oh well,least i don't have to take more regular jogs since i'm already regularly walking) +1
2) Downstairs room is the BOMB! Hell yeah.Right next to the kitchen.And cause its the maid's room,its tiny and cosy enough for me and ONLY me.Plus point is getting the room beside to throw my clothes in and other unwanted junks.+2
3) Internet's up and running.Ok,thats only a recent event but i guess its still counted. +1
4) Ah liang's house is just 2 doors away.AWESOME!!!+1
5) Eating out's been pretty cheap I have to say.And the food's AWESOME!!! I'm so into banana leaf rice at the moment.lolz..+1

Total of plus points = 6

Now the Shiat part
1) House is FULL of SHIAT!!And i mean LIZARD shiat.Like,what the heck!!I thought the landlord said he was gonna clean the place.And the layers of dust is enough to coat a layer of cake! (this is why I am starting to feel alil annoyed with the landlord,no offence to my Indian friends but INDIANS! And his a lawyer.What a joke/combo) -2
2) If you though army camps or NS camps are bad,think again.The place is BREEDING mosquitoes.I'm talking by the ARMIES! If i could mind control this lil blood sucking monsters,I could dominate the world within the first week itself.Again,told the landlord to gas the place but till now..I'm waiting for the cows to come home too. -1
3) DO NOT get conned by the solar powered water heated.Seriously,ITS A SCAM!!Already been taking ICY COLD SHOWERS for 2 WHOLE WEEKS!!Also been telling that AhNey about it but what has he done? NIT ZIL NADA!!Goin on bout his techinician not here,need to fix this and that.WTH!!If someone tells u its not been working for a whole week non-stop,DO SOMETHING BOUT IT!!!I'm not bugging u cause I've nothing better to do.Its already bad enough I have asthma excarbated by cold,here I am taking COLD SHOWERS every freaking time!If i catch pneumonia or fall sick,AhNey's just met his last client!Already when I have to jump into the cold shower I've to psycho myself to 'SUCK IT IN!!' but there's a limit to how much i can take and the limit's about to meet.-3
4) Packed schedule's not making it any better.Internal is one killer I vouch for that.Non stop work from 8-5 pm.So different from the IMU BJ schedule where its 2 hours lectures,prob another 2 hours of CSU or PBL and ur free to kill yourself the rest of the day for choosing med only to have to do it again the next day.Now,I don't even think I have time to kill myself.Wait,don't even think i can even think bout it cause time's too precious to waste on thinking of such things at the moment. -1

So the total score : -7

Hence bringing the total score to...
A -1!!!

Don't get me wrong.Leaving in Seremban is great.But u just have to becareful with the type of ppl ur gonna stay with and the type of landlords ur gonna suck it up with the next 2 years.

Feeling homesick is pretty normal I guess.I've been away longer before from home but I guess the feeling is slightly different now.Least before this,I know I can still come home.But now,I'm not sure when I can come home.When I came home this weekend,I felt like I really understood the term 'Home Sweet Home' and 'There's no Place like Home'.The moment I stepped into the house,various feelings and thoughts just rushed through me.One of them being,I'm glad i'm home,but why do I feel alil like a stranger in my own home?That feeling was futher amplified when I walked into my room and saw my bed covered with a sheet like its not been in use for ages.It also felt weird when I woke up this morning not to the already familiar sight of my small store room (like Harry Potter) but to a room that I was starting to leave behind.
Then there's the thought of no longer coming home to my brother watchin TV or atleast shouting a greet when I walk through the door.Or see him bend over his computer in his room when I walk past it.

So much said,I think its time to hit the books alil then start packing for my journey back to the land of the dead.
Literally....

24 hour convenience stores?

Sometimes,and this u have to agree with me,we wish we had more than just the usual 7/11 convenience store in terms of variety.
I'm not talking bout what they sell in 7/11.I'm not complaining there cause seriously,whoever came up with this business is really God Sent.
But I'm talking bout things that 7/11 don't sell.
Like yarns.Cause I'm in the midst of making something for my brother as his parting gift and i'm out of yarn.Its 1am in the morning and I'm rushing for time to finish it so,I'm really wishing now for a God Sent Convenient Store that sells things other than food and basic necessities.
Why couldn't there be a 24 hour Mall?I think its a pretty darn good business.
Think bout it,people who are busy during the waking hours and have no time to shop during the day can still go shopping at night after work and not rush to get the shopping done before the shops close at 10 pm.Or if you cant' slp and need to go somewhere to just jalan-jalan (and feel relatively safe than out on the streets with those thugs and gila ppl)..
Maybe I shd try this business if I ever make it big :P
Oh wait,bad idea,I'm not a business minded person.I'l probably get cheated within the first 24 hours of business and go bankrupt the following day..
Lolz..

Gah!!
Looks like I've to wait it out till a more appropriate time for the stores to open and then get my yarn.Till then I shall stare at my work and kick myself for not getting it earlier when I had the chance AND for doing nothing but stare at it when I could have finished half of it if I had my darn yarn..
Sigh..

Btw,Knitting's fun :)
Haha..

24 hour convenience stores?

One more week to go and I'm off down south,45 minutes away to the not-so-forsaken-town-called-Seremban.Half excited,half dreading it.
Can't wait to start anew there,staying out on my own with the housemates (God forbid we shall ever have probs in the house) and starting clinical :) *jump jump*
CAN WAIT,to letting my bed-hubby go (I really feel like dismantling it and reassembling it in Seremban but I'l have to repeat that tedious process every weekend when I come back to KL.
CAN WAIT,to stay home and eat more of mum's food.I'm lazy to cook and if i cant get any lazier,I can actually go on an empty stomach until someone offers to buy food for me..or until my stomach sings to a frequency of 120 Hertz.Hoping the former comes first though *grinz*
CAN WAIT,to leave the comforting scene of my room that I've grown into and REALLY rooted myself into.
CAN WAIT,to leave Astro behind before having to stick to papers of medical notes and anything NOT related to the medical world,sans House M.D.

I think if I had a choice,I'l uproot my entire house and bring it along with me to Seremban.I think I'm too attached to this familiar surroundings I call HOME.
~Home is where the heart is~

Life is starting to be quite a biatch.Waiting for the seniors to move out and for the landlord to faster fix the house so that I can throw my stuffs into my room and make list of things I need to buy.Going back to Kuantan again this weekend coz STOOPID HOD's in Kuantan GH froze all the HO's leaves until further notice due to H1N1.Wonder who's fault is it that the cases are starting to rise rampantly.As to the HOD,I'm trying to see from a positive POV why they are such a bunch of brainless ticks with the most ridiculous set of rules ever imaginable.
Evidently,I'm failing miserably at that and am now wishing,like the rest of the HO's there,for them to either trip down the staircase and get a severe head injury or an alien aducts them and after rewiring their off-centered-grey-white-matter,they'l be somewhat nicer and more reasonable and hopefully,more humane than what they falsely portray now.Makes u really wonder if the older some doctors get,the lower their brains sink out of their heads and into their gluteals.Lets blame it on GRAVITY so that the world can be happy:)
Back to the landlord and the seniors currently habitating the house I'm renting,I am seriously praying now that the landlord doens't call me on the 31st to tell me I can move in.Starting to regret taking a house with seniors currently occupying it and having exams so near to the date others want to move into.

Now that its coming to the end of the month,feels kinda sad so many ppl are flying off.
*cries*
I hate having to say GoodBye's and parting ways.It really just places a black dot in my story.I wished,many a times,that time will always continue on this loop frame,where time stops but we don't and we're stuck in this time loop.No goodbyes :)
Harapan Gemuk!!
Worst yet,my lil brother is leaving too...
*Cries a river*
I'm gonna miss that lil-huge monster that has always tormented my life.How we have grown from fighting over toys to space to when-we-are-bored-and-have-nothing-todo-but-annoy-each-other-till-mum-comes-and-gives-her-FGS.

Dang photoshop is not working!!GAH!!
Cant edit my photos to blog...*stabs photoshop*

Lazy to update further..
My tummy is starting to fold...
GASP!!!
Must start jogging again...

Of make ups and creating 'Good impressions'

Ever gotten that deje vu feeling when someone tells u something and u swore u heard it before somewhere somehow but cat put ur finger on it?

I got another deja vu,this time coming from me own boss!!
Happened last friday while i was busy at work.A friend dropped in at work.After she left,boss made a comment bout her that went something like this..

Boss: Eh,that girl your friend is it?
Me : Yup.
Boss : Wah,quite pretty ah.Her hair so nice.And she uses make up somemore,looks very pretty.
Me : Erm,yea.Alot of my batchmates use it alot,even just to come for lectures.
Boss : Yea,I can tell also.Some girls really care bout how they look and really take the effort to do it.

After a moment of silence.

Boss : I can tell if a girl wants to be pretty.Like like to put on make up and dress nicely.
Me : Oh. (What can i say,i was busy doing my work le...)
Boss : People like M...(looks at me and only when I look at her ) and like you la.
Me : *blink,blink* Har?
Boss : Yalah,u don't put make up.See how you sit also can tell your not the kind who cares about what people think about you.
(I was sitting crossleg on the chair in front of the computer in plane view for everyone who walks in to see my cinapek style of sitting.Not my fault le,its so uncomfortable to sit straight back doing work in front of the computer.And staring at the computer screen all day makes me even more uncomfortable so I NEED to get comfy if I want to finish my work...such innocence shot to the grown..cries)

Yes,this is not the first time that I've heard it.
I'm not a huge fan of donning make up and dressing to the nines.I may have a nifty stash of those artificial colouring used to paint the face like some form of artist's canvas but honestly I will say it here,I don't use much of it.
To prove it,I swear by the fact that some of the items in my stash are MORE than 5 years already.AND!!! Its still new,like it was still off the shelf.
The most I use,is a lip gloss and eye liner.Occasionally when I have break-outs and am on the out,I use concealer and face powder.I do always use a lip balm coz my lips crack easily from the dry air in uni to the point it bleeds.And yes,its REALLY painful when it bleeds.But other than that,everything else stays in the stash.
As to what prompt me to buy them,don't ask.I blame it on their attractive colours that just attracts me like a fish to a worm.Lol..

Taking a trip back to the past,I remembered when someone first brought up this very same topic.

Flash back 1 :
Grandpa came down for a visit when I was still in high school.He and dad got talking bout something i cant quite remember.Me was happily jumping off the stairs when he suddenly turned and said "U must also learn how to dress properly next time.Looks give people the first impression about u.Must learn to dress nicely,especially if you want to go for interviews.And act properly also la.Don't be so unlady like."
Yes,i nearly missed my footing when that happen.

Flash back 2 :
This was sometime very much later,my dad brought up the exact same thing.Like I did not listen to the first time grandpa mentioned it.
"The way u dress carries what kind of person you are.Its important to dress right for the occasion.Don't simple wear anything just because."
I think my dad was referring to the fact that back then,I was always in baggy clothes and on occasions,even to functions in jeans.YES,i think Dank,will have a field at that statement and this next one.I wore baggy clothes when i was in high school cause I love the freedom of movements it gave me.
Until someone thought I was so kesian to wear oversized hand-me-downs from my non-existent brother and mistook me for a kid coz of my size.Sheesh..such prejudice against small size people.

Flash back 3 :
An uncle in church brought up the SAME topic again when I was usherring in the front.

Church uncle :Girl,your already in college ledi.How come u don't use any make up wan?
Me : Har? What for?
Church uncle : Coz all the other girls ur age using some.See,they look so nice.
Me : *small laugh*Aiyo,I only come to church la,don't need to wear until THAT nice.After that just go home only so dun need la.
Church uncle : But you look so pale la.At least with some on,you wouldn't look so pale.And maybe look fresher.Looks is important.Cause it creates impression.Must dress nicely too.
Me : ...........
Point to note,I blame the flourescent lights for making me look pale.Then again,I'm slightly anaemic so maybe the finger points back to me.Oh,and because I was on duty,I have to wake up earlier and being not much of an early riser,it probably explains why I look pale and dead in the morning.And for my choice of tacky clothes :P
And no,that does not mean I dress to the nines and don make up for church.I still don my favourite jeans and tees,no make up coz i want the extra minutes snoozing :P

But honestly,I don't see the point of donning that much make up and dressing up so nice.I've seen women who apply so much foundation it literally MELTS off their face like icing on a cake and some dressing like they are going for a dinner gala when they are only selling frozen meat in a small shop.I've known some who take HOURS to beautify themselves and take painstalking hours of rummaging through their warehouse amount of clothes,JUST to go out and get a couple of groceries.
Is that logical to anyone out there?
Ok,fine,true,you don't know who might be watching but do u really care WHO is watching?
On the finer note,WHO ARE you expecting to be watching you?Again,does it really matter if and why they are watching?
Why couldn't all women be like men,just thrown on a shirt and pants and alil scent to cover up the bad BO and out the door we go.Why the fuss bout getting the hair right,the make up right and getting the right clothes to go with the right shoes and the right bag?

No wonder they say women are complicated.
Heck,even I'm flabbergasted with my own spesies.

Gay-shiatness

No,not referring to that kind of gay (guy-guy).
In modern terms,the word 'gay' is used to define ultimate awesomeness or something that seems totally out of this world.

"That was some gay-shiat" = "That was awesome"
"That guy is so gay" = " That guy is awesome/cool"

U get the picture la.

Anyway,gayness to me comes in many forms.

The first :
Yup,u saw her in FF7AC and Dead Fantasy.The only chick who kicks ass with her bare hands..
Since we're on dead fantasy...

The second :
You remember monty oum?

The third:
You remember Pachelbel's Canon in D?
Remember the gay Korean dude who made it a sensation by jamming it out on his electrical guitar?



Now check this lil monkey out.
Yes,his alil Korean as well.
Whats up with Korean's these days,you just have to wonder..



Wonder if its in the kimchi they eat everyday.Must have some brain enhancing effects to produce seriously gay people like these..
There's more from that in youtube.Just search Sungha Jung.
How much more gay can he get?



The fourth:

Was in the car on the way to work one day listening to Hitz and they mentioned bout Tom Felton (Yup,the guy who played lil Louie in Anna and the King and more recently,Draco Malfoy in HP) has his own musical band thingy.Got alil curious and went to search it up.



Gotta admit though,his pretty good.And quite the looker too*grinz*
And he plays the guitar so well (extra plus dream points)
I remembered when the movie first came up bout 6 years ago,my fren who was overly crazy bout Tom Felton told me he was actually born the same year as we were.I found that rather hard to believe especially after watching the show.He looked just like an 8 year old kid.How was that lil kid suppose to be a 15 year old back then?Unless UK kids mature really slowly..

Does this look like 15 year old to you?

Anyway,what the heck.His going out with a PA from the HP troup so too bad.
There's more of his composition and performance on youtube and his fan site,termed feltbeats.com.

Me thinks his got potential as a musician too.Kinda like his songs coz its not long and draggy.

Think that rounds up the gay list for now.

Wait,there's one more...

FRANGIPANI!!
Haha,insiders joke.

Toodles!